When a relationship ends and children are involved, one of the most important (and often emotional) conversations you’ll have is how to support them financially. Understandably, you want to ensure your child’s needs are met, but you shouldn’t be expected to shoulder the costs alone.
It cannot be overstated how important these discussions are. After all, you don’t want to be solely financially responsible for your kids. Raising children is expensive, and your ex has a legal responsibility to contribute to their day-to-day lives.
That’s where a child maintenance agreement comes in.
Whether you’re arranging payments through the Child Maintenance Service (CMS) or opting for a legally binding consent order via the courts, it’s essential to understand what’s considered acceptable, and what isn’t.
What Is Child Maintenance?
Child maintenance is financial support paid by the non-resident parent (the one the child doesn’t live with most of the time) to the parent with day-to-day care. It helps cover the costs of raising your child, until they’re 16, or 20 if they remain in full-time education.
If you’re planning to start negotiating with your ex over a suitable agreement on child maintenance payments, there are two ways you can go about this:
- Through the CMS – a government-run service that calculates payments based on the paying parent’s income.
- Via a consent order – a private agreement made legally binding by a court.
What Does the CMS Cover?
The Child Maintenance Service calculates payments based on gross income, taking into account things like:
- Housing
- Food & groceries
- Clothing
- Utilities
- Standard school fees or nursery care
However, the CMS has its limitations. It doesn’t account for:
- Income above a certain threshold
- Private school tuition
- Hobbies, extracurriculars, or trips
- Transport and technology costs
- Additional healthcare needs
If your child’s needs go beyond the basics, you may wish to pursue a consent order, which allows you to agree on a wider range of contributions.
Extras You Might Want to Include in a Consent Order
If you’re creating a bespoke agreement through the courts, here are some additional costs you may want to factor in:
Education Beyond the Basics
Private school fees, uniforms, after-school tutoring, and school trips can all be included. These are often overlooked by the CMS but can be vital for a child’s development.
Extracurricular Activities
Sports clubs, piano lessons, drama, swimming lessons, these activities enrich your child’s life and shouldn’t be ignored. A consent order can include regular contributions toward such hobbies.
Technology for Learning and Safety
Tablets, laptops, and smartphones may be essential for homework or keeping in touch. Consider including tech costs, particularly for older children.
Travel Costs
Transport to and from school or clubs can add up—whether that’s bus fares, petrol, or parking. If travel is required for co-parenting arrangements (e.g., meeting halfway), this too can be shared.
Additional Healthcare
Standard NHS care is covered, but private dental care, therapy sessions, or specialist eye care can be included in a consent order, particularly if they’re deemed necessary.
What Not to Include
While it’s tempting to factor in everything, remember: child maintenance is for the child, not the parent. Don’t include:
- Your personal bills unrelated to the child
- Holidays for yourself
- Luxury items unless essential for the child’s health or wellbeing
Keeping things child-focused will make negotiations smoother and more enforceable in court.
Final Thoughts
Creating a child maintenance agreement doesn’t have to be difficult or awkward, although it helps if you are on reasonable talking terms. Whether you choose the CMS or go down the legal route with a consent order, the key is keeping the focus on your child’s genuine needs.
Remember, it’s not about winning or losing. it’s about giving your child the best possible support, together. Do your research on the Child Maintenance Service and it will help this happen.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do I need to go to court for a child maintenance agreement?
No. You can use the Child Maintenance Service, or create a voluntary agreement. A consent order via the court is only necessary if you want a legally enforceable arrangement.
Can a consent order include private school fees?
Yes. Unlike the CMS, consent orders can cover private tuition, school trips, and other extras.
Can I change the agreement later?
Yes, if your financial situation changes significantly, you can apply to vary a consent order or request a CMS reassessment.
Is child maintenance tax-deductible?
No. In the UK, child maintenance is not taxable income, nor can it be claimed as a tax deduction.
Helpful UK Resources
Child Maintenance Calculator – gov.uk
Arranging child maintenance – Citizens Advice
For more guidance on parenting and dealing with divorce, check out:
- How to support your children while going through a divorce.
